Things to avoid when sending messages

When you find someone that you are interested in on, it is time to send them a personal message! You do not have to be nervous about sending the message. Not everyone will reply, but a good number of people will if you are sure to follow a few simple guidelines!

The very most important thing to do before sending any message on a dating site is to read the person's profile. You should never send a “form letter” to everyone in your area; no matter how good you might think it is, they will be able to tell that you are taking the easy way out and sending everyone the same message.

You should read each person's profile carefully to make sure that you are actually interested in that person. If you are, your message should include personal statements about the person that you learned from the profile. Once again, do not send a generic “hello” message. This will make it obvious that you paid no personal attention to the message-receiver.

While your message should be personalized, you should take care not to make the message-receiver feel uncomfortable. Under normal circumstances, comments about personal appearance should be staunchly avoided in your first message. Talking about the person's beauty or muscle mass, unless it is clearly mentioned in the profile, can come across as creepy. You should also avoid talking frankly about sex, unless the online dating profile specifically states that the person is looking for that kind of chat. Under all circumstances, avoid talking or asking about very personal topics (such as politics, religion, and moral viewpoints).

The dating site can be a great vehicle for meeting people as long as you know how to send a good opening message. Your goal should be to come across as personable, not as overbearing. Never make the message-receiver feel like he or she is just another check mark on the list of names. Make them feel special and personally interesting to you!

Anton Ivanin,